Well, Hello My Younger Self,
How cute you look in your fifth-grade school picture: a pretty smile, well-groomed and well-dressed in the mother-daughter jumper mother’s tailor designed and made. Dad purchased the tartan wool fabric in Scotland while in Europe.
This year, you learned to set and style your own hair. You “done good” for the school picture; mother approved. I approve of you standing up for yourself by taking off your thick, black framed glasses before the picture was taken so everyone can see how adorable you are. I encourage you to stand up for yourself more often: it’s a valuable skill. You also need to find your own voice to be effective.
Next year, braces! Oh, please don’t whine, it’s going to turn out OK. When you start high school, no more glasses or braces and you will be very pretty. There will be times when you will want to hide behind ugly glasses since you’re so shy. Everyone your age is insecure and is only acting confident. This is a phase and others are better actors. In time you will out-grow the shyness while making mistakes along the way – think of them as growing pains. As you grow up, you will experience worse things and will laugh at your naivete.
Our parents never gave you a nickname so I’m calling you “lovey.” You have accomplished a great deal, more than you give yourself credit: a particularly good swimmer (even when underwater); a good reader; have had one or two ballet recitals and three piano recitals, earned many girl scout badges (the sash was full when you stopped going). Lovey, although you inspire me, what’s with not moving forward to the next step of a skill? You need an advocate or a mentor: ten years old is too young to drop out of anything. I bet an adult made these decisions.
Getting back to the piano recitals, you really enjoyed practicing and memorizing the challenging Brave Knight piece for your last recital. And, pounding out the cords confidently on the keys, while using the pedal for the first time. This may have been the beginning of self-expression and problem solving. Next year, your sixth-grade teacher will encourage you to write, another venue for self-expression. In fact, she will let you author a short story on an essay test about a young girl crossing the prairie in a wagon train with her family during the 1800s, which incorporated the concepts taught in the unit. Even as an adult you will enjoy writing.
Lovey, your life will never be as easy as it is now. The safe, secure, familiar world you’re living in will not be the world you will live in as an adult. The technology you’re used to is changing rapidly and one day you will work in a field of which you have never heard. You need to be ready: the party line your family shares with another family will not exist when you’re an adult and you will carry your own small phone around with you. Think about the jet planes dad flies, which are just starting to break the sound barrier during your ten-year-old year; the noise upsets everyone. It’s a baby step towards men walking on the moon, which I will witness as an adult; and, staying up to date with space craft exploring planets studied in school will be a regular part of your adult life as well.
In closing: I encourage you to dream big; be awed by the milky way; read more broadly, especially about science; cherish the desert; and improve your math. Go back to Sunday School: you need to learn about God and Jesus, hope, faith, perseverance, and community to get you through many grim times. As an adult, you will move to New York City and re-discover ballet and playing the piano from time to time.
Love to you always Lovey, Karen